Friday, July 04, 2008
Back not too long ago from the funeral wake of my Grand Aunt, one lovely and respectable woman in the family. I mean, she's my porpor's brother's wife, that makes her a so-called outsider to the family, but she's still really very good to everyone of us. Although she's obviously not as close to me as my porpor is, but from the stories I've been hearing since young, from the things I've been seeing her do for her family, which is my Grand Uncle and their kids, she's really great. Honestly, my Grand Uncle don't seem to care for her at all, but she'll still be taking care of him, holding the family together etc. It's a pity that she's gone, but definitely, I'm glad that she went away peacefully, passing away in the sleep.
3 years ago, Great Grandmother No. 2 passed away.
6 years ago, Great Grandfather passed away.
9 years ago, Great Grandmother No. 1 passed away.
Is this some trend of something? But Grand Aunt's like the first in her generation. You see, It starts with Great ___, all gone, and now it's Grand ____'s turn. It's not something nice at all, it's saddening. It just hate seeing people leave the world one by one.
I'm selfish. I don't want either my porpor or gonggong to leave just anytime soon too. Gonggong's health seems to be deteriorating once again. From the fact that the maid shifted over to gonggong's house to stay to take care of him 24/7, him falling off the bed while trying to stand up in the middle of the night, the fell scaring him till he don't want to wake up, eat or whatsoever till daddy and kaima almost called the ambulance over to bring him to the hospital for checkups etc. That's how bad Gonggong's getting. Gonggong, please JIAYOU! I need you, WE NEED YOU!
Oh, talking about the maid shifting back to Gonggong's house, somehow, I MISS MY MAID! Can you imagine that? My tian! But it's true. It's been 3 nights without her sleeping on the floor, at the corner of my room. That feeling of walking into your room and not seeing someone there just feels so not good at all. Boo! The room feels less cosy, but instead, big and empty. Worst still, it's sadd to have to wake up in the middle of the night to close the windows myself because the rain's drizzling in through the window.
I mean, sometimes, I really wonder how's life without a maid. I did try that once for 2 years. Mummy stopped getting a maid because she claimed that we're old enough to take care of ourselves. But yes, I cannot remember a single thing I did in contribution to the cleanliness of the house. I know, I'm dumb, stupid, lazy, useless, whatever ever, but I don't do any of those "maid" stuff other than having to wash my own undergarments because Mummy will never allow them in the washing machine! Oh! Maybe I did sweep the floor once or twice in that 2 years. Shit! This is really damn BAD! My tian. Anyway, thanks Daddy & Mummy, for doing all the housework because Geraldine Lu's definitely alot worst than me! Ok, but she's getting alot better now, and I hope it does continue. Haa!
Anyway, I can't even cook WHITE RICE ok? Does that sound so much better to prove the spoilt brat in me? I'm sorry then. To whoever my future husband will be. Haa!
Digressing way too badly, back at the funeral wake, I'm glad I got to see my Grand Aunts and Uncles once again. Miss them loads! I promise! We used to be meeting like 3-4 times a year, but now, hardly even once a year because the oldest in the family's like gone. They're like the best "old folks" I've known. They're really good at talking nonsense with you, entertaining you, playing with you, making fun of you etc etc! It was nice to get that perfect feel back once again, that relative-ly love! ((: But, must it only happen in occasions like these?
Recently, my paternal side is also facing some problems something like this. It's really great for all of us to get together for a holiday, but the underlying reason of it is because Er Gu's cancer has spread to her lungs and it's not going to get any better, but worst, worst and worst! I mean, must these happy times only come when sadd moments are there?
Planning a getaway together is a happy thing. Being together during the trip is another happy thing. Even going to somewhere near, like Genting, is a happy thing. But what will we be feeling when we're back?
Honestly speaking, Er Gu super 疼 MeiMei and I. My heart hurt so badly the very first time I heard of her cancer. When we were still in BLC, she's the only relative I see every week because she's the only one attending the same church as us. The rest of them are all at LCOR. When I was younger, she'll always be carrying MeiMei and I around in church, playing with us etc. As we grew older, she was concerned about our studies and our lives just like Daddy & Mummy. Whatever we need, whatever we want, she'll get it for us. Especially toys! And every birthday, she never fails to give me a HongBao even when all the relatives stopped when we crossed 12? That's a super simplified version of Er Gu.
Digressed again! Ok, even for Gonggong, the reason why we travelled as a family to A'Famosa in June was because it's his wish for us all to go on a holiday together. His original destination was Christmas Island, but because of his physical ability, we could only settle for Malaysia. Can someone please tell me why it's all so cruel? Why don't we cherish every moment with every closed ones so that we won't have to be doing so much to replace the lost now? Regrets after things have happened? I, myself, cannot do it. Why? Argh! Boo. )):
We're racing against time! That SUCKS! BADLY!
How long more am I, or are we, going to get tortured by this? Gonggong (materal), KaiMa (materal)'s leaving to HongKong, Er Gu (paternal) and what more? Currently, my Grand Aunt (materal). I'm not that strong to live with them racing against time. I myself need time for so many, so many, so many other stuffs too. Hais. But I'll promise, as much as I can, I'll be there whenever they need me, especially to go home more often for dinner with Gonggong. I CANNOT IMAGINE DINNER WITHOUT HIM! )):
Thank God, in the mist of the series of unfortunate events in my life comes some happy moments too.
Had dinner at KaiMa's house tonight with KaiMa, Claudia, Gonggong, Porpor, MeiMei and Mummy. (Daddy had a meeting in church) And guess what, KaiMa gave me another high cut boots! This time, it's from Italy, but cheaper, around $200-$300. But, it's something she wore before and she loves it alot. She's migrating to HongKong and can't bring that many pairs over, so, it's MINE now! No, it's also because she just got any similar pair in brown and she's bringing that over. Oh! And she showed me her pair of PRADA BOOTS! F-ing beautiful! I must say! What do you expect from a Tai-Tai life? Haa! Ok, so this 2nd pair of boots from KaiMa's part 2 of my 19th birthday present from her. ((:
And then again, it's back to thinking about my uncle! Due to seeing his parents, my Grand Uncle and Aunt, at the funeral wake just now.
He's Mummy's cousin. Disclaimer! No incest. Ok, he's getting really successful. At the age of 30, he's a freelance and the makeup artist for most Channel 5 artists! Woo. He used to be working for M.A.C at Isetan Scotts and I remember afew times Mummy and Kai Ma visited him at the shop and I'll be really happy everytime, that's when I was still a kid, I promise!
Yes, I know, MALE makeup artist just sounds SUPER GAY! But I can assure you that he's nothing like G-A-Y! He's like super tall, at least to me, super fit, his built, super charming, and he has that SUPER SMILE that I fell in love with the very first time I saw it.
He's also the guy who originated the "loving guy's smile" in my life. Because of his first smile, I admired guys who have that really beautiful smile. (years down, my msn's nick revolves around "love that smile") My boyfriend/future husband must look really charming with that megawatt smile! It would be even better if his could be nicer than Uncle's. Haa!
Yupp, and all I could do is still to think of him only because he's my uncle, and he's like 11 years older than me!
Gosh. I didn't realise that I've typed so much! Guess I better STOP!
Nights! ((:
gloriia ((:
1:25 AM
